Whee ! It’s Woman’s day !

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Hello everyone !

Whee ! Today it’s woman’s day, so get 75 % off everything on the site with the code WOMANSDAY2018 !
And if you buy a sexy lacy bra, you get a free vacuum cleaner !
Also because we all know that women love sweet stuff, they all get free desserts at the restaurant.

Don’t forget to buy flowers !

Okay this was a slightly exagerated version of what we could see in advertisements each year. And I got one of these today.

No

This year I decided to write about what I think of this subject.

First of all, a little historic point :
In France this day is called International day of Women’s Rights. It has been made official in 1977 by the United Nations, and it originated from the movements for women’s rights at the beginning of the 20th century, when women were protesting for better work conditions and vote.

This day is still celebrated today, because unlike some people might believe (and not only men, but also some women), we still don’t have equal rights.
And I think that it is something very important to remind everyone about this.

So no, it’s not a special sales and discounts day for women.

For equality…

I see you coming so I stop you right now.
You are thinking about extrmist feminists (I like to call them “feminazis”) who want women to be superior, and who are complaining about men all the time, saying that they are all perverts / pigs / sexual assaulters / rapists / uglyandbad, without exception, “all the same”, so you have to hate them.
Do you know the concept of silent majority ? You can apply it to this situation.
If there is one violent man, there are a lot of them who are respectful and who don’t need to justify themselves.

By the way in my opinion, a good man will not even feel targeted by the polemics. They know that they are not concerned, and they don’t feel the need of saying it publicly.

So here is a message for the extremists : Please stop saying that all the men are the same and spread hate, because you give a very bad image of feminism.
I would even say that some women are the worst ennemies of feminism.

I don’t even like to use the word feminist, and I don’t like to say that I am one of them. Why ? Because I don’t want people to think that I am part of the extremists.
I used this word a few times, and some people were surprised. “But you don’t look like a feminist”, maybe because in people’s minds all of the feminists are extremists. It is like there is a “feminist style”, and that you can’t be a feminist when you like fashion (and even more when it’s vintage !), lingerie, shoes, make up and men.

This is why I don’t want to use the word feminist, and I prefer to say that I’m for equality. I consider that men are my equals.

So what do we want, what are we fighting for ?

We are still fighting for equal pay, against discrimination at work, and the right of making our own decisions about our bodies.

Do you think it is normal that we are paid less than men when we do the same work ?
No. And the worst is that I heard that some women think it’s normal ! “Because we get pregnant”, “Because we have to take care of our children when they are sick so we need more days off” and other nonsense. But the number one nonsense I heard was “Because we can’t carry heavy stuff like men”. What !
No. I don’t agree. Equal work needs equal pay. That’s all.
And believe me, no man will complain or feel less manly if a woman earns as much as he does. On the contrary, they will be happy that more money comes in the house. I let you think about that.

Yeah now let’s talk about children.

Of course I will particularly talk about the situation of child free women, because it is my choice, therefore it is the subject I know best. But I also know that women with children are discriminated too.

Having children or not, is your choice.

No woman should be judged wether she chooses to have children or not, and nobody should be allowed to discuss this choice.
Oh god, I forgot ! Our bodies don’t belong to us, but to others who make decisions for us !
It’s the others who know everything better than us. They even know what we really want.

People arounf you who want to force you into maternity, doctors who say that your biological clock is ticking and who try to convince you not to abort or even to stop taking birth control, but also all these companies in which you applied for a job.

You have children ? So we won’t hire you, because you will miss work if your children get sick, or you will ask if you can leave earlier because you have to take Kevin to his base ball game.

You don’t have children ? So you will get pregnant soon ! Admit it, this is why you want this job ! You say you don’t want kids ? You’re a liar !

Oh by the way, this makes me think of a story.
This message is for you, lady (yes !) with who I had a job interview years ago before I chose to be self employed.
You did not wanted to hire me, because I was a 20-something with no children “yet”. You said that I wanted this job so I can get pregnant directly after signing the permanent contract. You said that “they all say they don’t want children just to get the job”.
This happened to me several times, and still happens to a lot of my chil free friends today.

I say HELLO to all the companies who did not hire me because I was without children. And who would not have hired me either if I had kids.

Whoohoo, great mentality ! This is how progress is working !
We are not done with recruitment discrimination yet.

Welcome to the middle ages.

I think it is revolting that today it is still frowned upon when a woman says she doesn’t want children.
Just because someone stated once that the “purpose” of women was to give life. And therefore, the one saying that she wont is considered “broken” or a liar.

But having children isn’t right either. And for more fun, you will have a mandatory number of children. One is not enough, but more is too much.
And the worst is having no kids. Because you’re a selfish monster who only wants to have fun and who refuses to do what she was made for. And it’s even worse if one wants to have an abortion.

There will always be someone who will make a decision for you. Say no.

Nobody will say these things to a man. A man who doesn’t want children is considered as normal, “because children are a girls thing, it’s normal that dudes are not interested in them.”

FUN FACT : Women who are not interested in children exist.

So this was “my feminism”, with the causes I believe in. Equal pay and the right of making my own decisions regarding what I do with my body according to my beliefs and will, without being judged.

My principles in short :

+ Your body belongs to you, and you are the only one who can decide what you want to do or not with it.

+ You are free to decide if you want to use birth control, and it doesn’t make you a “irresponsible whore who only wants to have fun” (*FUN FACT* : Married people in long term relationships also use birth control…)

+ Have fun with your favorite man. Love him a lot, because he loves you too.

+ You decide that you have an abortion because you don’t want to be a mother ? Nobody should decide for you or make you feel guilty. It is your choice and has to be respected.

+ Your work isn’t worth less than a man’s. Refuse to be paid less.

+ Men are not disgusting beings who constantly want to harm you. Noisy minority, silent majority.

+ Respect of the others definition of happiness : You have the right not wanting to have children. Don’t hesitate to express your opinion to those who want to force you into maternity. As you respect their choice, they have to respect yours.

To conclude, here is a video I really like.
Even if we still have to fight for equal rights, we must not forget that we are part of the lucky ones.

 

Estelle,
Bonbon Maléfique,

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